By Which We Stand
by Wine Mom Swan
Summary: The mystery which dyes the world with red in the moonlight, and shines blue like oceans under the sun. The legend that should grant life, and has taken too many.
1. Light

Kaito didn't- doesn't- understand what happened that night on the clock tower.

Sure, he knows _what_ happened, but there was something _different_ about the air that night, thick with an exciting tension that had his heart beating wildly in his chest. He remembers looking up at the helicopter from his position on the clock hand, seeing moonlight bounce off glass windows and navy blue sleeves as someone revealed yet another one of his carefully set up tricks, remembers Nakamori- _keibu_ creaming curses at whoever was up there. He remembers a smooth voice echoing through the vents as that officer followed after him, low and smug as it predicts movements he knows he would have made- did make- and most of all, he remembers feeling _alive_.

But the real reason he doesn't understand that night has nothing to do with the air or the sensation.

It has to do with the man in the helicopter, face shadowed mostly by darkness. It has to do with the glint of his smile in the moonlight, and that split-second as he turns away, when the moonlight catches in the blue ocean of his eyes and flashes _red_.

He knows every detail of the legend he's been chasing, has read it over and over more times than he can count, scanned over translations and interpretations so he can say for sure that he know _exactly_ what he's looking for.

That night leaves him questioning everything he's learned.

 _What is Pandora, really? How much is legend, and how much is truth?_

* * *

The next time he sees that flash of red is on the rooftop of the Haido City Hotel.

It's a kid, smiling up at him with that same snide smirk as the man of the helicopter, the same ocean-bright eyes that catch the moonlight in a way that reveals depths of an ocean too deep for a child his age.

The flash comes and goes so quickly that he almost doubts seeing it, as it disappears beneath to large glasses and goes blue again, and he's distracted by the curl of his mouth and the fake childishness of his tone, distracted enough to forget what he's looking for for a moment and smile back, perform the way he used to when he was still naive and innocent and his father was by his side.

It's more alive than he's felt in years, and it gives him an odd sort of clarity, makes him feel like he can push himself to new heights like never before.

* * *

He learns not to underestimate the little tantei- _kun_ the next time they meet.

He doesn't see the red, but he's met with that same all-knowing smirk, same pair of eyes so deep and alive that he can't help but smile and run with it, work on his toes instead of on predictability and patterns.

The kid- Edogawa Conan- seems at first to be a little oblivious, childish and innocent. But there's something there when he turns away, something sharp and dangerous that sets his heart on fire with excitement. His disguise of the guardian, Mouri Ran, seems to be well enough, and it seems all too easy to enthrall the audience yet again, to take the jewel in the bout of panic that ensues.

And then Edogawa Conan comes along, smiling widely like a child, bouncing excitedly on his heels and going on about knowing where KID is, dragging him along to 'find' him. It's more amusing than anything else, at first, watching him follow a false trail, but then he strays off path and leads him further and further away from the crowds, and suddenly it's not as funny anymore.

The childish tone stays, deductions spilling easily from the kid's lips, and then he turns and smirks like he knows everything, and Kaito feels inclined to think he _does_ , because in the next moment he feels as though his mask has been stripped away. He reaches for the phone, trying desperately not to give anything away, even knowing it's too late, and then the phone shatters in a mess of plastic and wiring, and Edogawa Conan's voice lowers a few octaves, the dangerous feeling returning full force.

The most unexpected thing about that night is not the smug tone of his voice when he mentions to Nakamori- _keibu_ about KID being human, not invincible, nor was it when he saw through his disguise with an ease that put him on edge. No, the thing that surprised Kaito the most was his reaction to his little quip of being a method actor.

No normal child reacts to the flash of a bra with outrage and vague embarrassment. None.

* * *

He keeps running into Edogawa Conan, both in his element and out.

It starts with a burning bridge.

Meeting Edogawa Conan at the Magic Lovers Club get together is unexpected.

Watching him run across a burning bridge to tell them to leave is even more so.

When he wakes up again, he's got that too-old wariness in the lines of his face, that look in his eyes that's a resigned sigh and a determined glare at the same time.

He's in his element, more than Kaito has ever seen before. It's…enlightening, in some respects, and depressing, because the kid's obviously used to bodies falling from the sky, and even more used to convoluted and generally absurd ways of hiding evidence and methods. And they way he enthralls his audience- yes, an audience, because that's the only really way to explain the group that trails behind him like a group of stray dogs- is so much like the way his father taught him to, with dramatic flares and little movements and "meaningless" questions that drag the attention away from what's really happening until all is revealed.

Each revelation he leads them along comes with a satisfied smirk and a brightening of eyes, each step carefully calculated in a way that reminds Kaito of himself, in a way, and he understands now how the kid could so easily see through his tricks that night on the boat.

The most unexpected part, Kaito thinks, is the finale. He lead them around like children (not that anyone noticed, other than him), and now, he's doing something so questionable (in terms of the law, at least,) that it makes Kaito hesitate, double take.

Who knew the little tantei _-kun_ would make his deductions by tranquilizing the Suzuki heiress and using her voice?

Well, it certainly explains "Sleeping Kogorou's" sudden genius.

* * *

From then on, Kaito makes a point of _watching_. Whenever Edogawa Conan appears, he watches, seeing every little question as it is, a _manipulation_. And how easily the kid can manipulate, from the police to the witnesses, the suspects, the culprit, all with a childish brightness in his eyes and a sharp smirk.

Edogawa Conan is a force to be reckoned with, and it makes things all the more exciting.

Edogawa Conan is full of surprises.

Kaito knows this.

But still, every surprise comes unexpected, and Edogawa Conan's surprises are always extraordinarily unpredictable.


	2. Shroud

Kudou Shinichi is, and has always been, a performer. Sure, he's not an entertainer (though his mother would claim him to be a musician, but that was neither here nor there) but he knows how to properly build up and put on a show. He's an actor- not like his mother, not at all, but an actor nonetheless, and he is _good_ at it.

In all honesty, his parents have taught him a good many of things.

Music.

Mystery.

Acting.

Curiousity.

Forensics.

Diplomacy.

 _Fear._

Piloting.

Sharpshooting.

Bomb defusing.

 _Fearlessness._

Sleight-of-hand.

Disguise.

Determination.

Abstract thinking.

Independence.

All in all, he has learned a lot. No matter how often his parents take off to travel, he will be thankful to them. The skills he's acquired over the years have been immensely helpful time and time again, and he's glad to have them.

* * *

Arrogance is a trait he knows how to , he takes pride in his work, and he is confident in his deductions, but it's always been more for the victim than himself. He knows better than to show any form of weakness, of hesitance, of uncertainty, in front of anyone during a case- about a case. The more confident he seems, the more likely it is for people to actually acknowledge his words, despite his age.

It's the reason he doesn't care much for catching thieves. Shinichi likes _truth_ , likes unearthing it, polishing it, revealing it to the world. It gives people _closure,_ it clears the way for a _second chance_ in a way they wouldn't have had otherwise. There is no real need for truth with thieves, not like there is with death. He does help solve the occasional theft, when he stumbles across it, but his forte has always been homicide.

This doesn't change when he helps try to catch the thief in the clocktower. He never did dwell much on that case- it's not like the thief meant any _real_ harm, anyway, so he never did anything to find out the outcome.

He had been more focused on avoiding the moonlight, either way.

* * *

Becoming a child is hell. He knew he wouldn't die, but it hurt enough that he almost wanted to.

But he and Death had- _have_ \- a complicated relationship. For every time and any time in his past, present, and future that he comes close to death, that there's a possibility of him dying, when he's on the edge of oblivion, he will survive- and there will be a case for him to solve, a soul for him to save. One could call him a shinigami. He calls it a curse.

It doesn't stop him from doing his job though, no matter how much it weighs on his conscious. He will find truth.

* * *

Shinichi may be an actor, but he knows what happens when a person engrosses themselves _too_ far in a role. Edogawa Conan appears, but he is careful- he never spends too much time playing the role of the child.

And in all honesty? It _hurts_.

But Shinichi is anything but a quitter. He will walk forward, no matter what obstacles he faces, no matter how much pain he is in, always forward, endlessly. If he has to do so as Conan?

So be it.

* * *

In all honesty, Shinichi never expected the glasses to be so useful.

He never _wanted_ glasses, but the features Agasa- _hakase_ put into them have been very useful, and the fact that they hide the Pandora red of his eyes at night is a _huge_ plus. That they separate Edogawa Conan from Kudou Shinichi even further is also a huge benefit, however ridiculous it seems.

Paranoia has carved itself into his bones. If something, _anything_ can help, he'll take it.

* * *

He has no interest in thieves- except, perhaps, this one.

It's the riddle that pulls him in, really. The mystery behind the little advance notice, that's what drags him in at first.

So he waits, ready with a firework and a match, and the thief's sense of timing reminds him of his mother- almost on cue with his name, which should be impossible. But Shinichi cannot judge, for he too, is a performer.

But then KID begins to treat him like a child, and Shinichi goes from intrigued to annoyed. And then, with a flash of inspiration and a sharp grin, that annoyance turns to excitement.

In the end, Shinichi can barely find it in himself to be irritated or angry. Instead, he finds himself to be almost _eager_ for their next meeting.

* * *

Being a child has a few... _entertaining_ benefits.

The look on Kaitou KID's face as Shinichi shatters the engine room phone with the sheer strength of his kick to a soccer ball is one of them. It's one of wide eyed shock and thinly veiled panic, and Shinichi wants to laugh- hell, he almost does, because children can do things like that- and appreciates being a child for the first time since he was shrunken.

 _Sometimes,_ he thinks, grinning dangerously up at the thief, _being underestimated is much more fun._

The entertaining factor lasts until the very last moment, and with a quick "method actor" quip, KID takes off, leaving a steaming (from both embarrassment and rage,) Shinichi in his wake.

* * *

Shinichi never imagined running across a burning bridge while woozy and sick would ever be something he would accomplish, and all in the name of justice, at that.

Unexpected as it is, he cannot be held back by such minor things like smoke inhalation and a cold.

He gets up and quickly sets to work, leading, _leading_ , and then-

Everything comes together in an instant, like a particularly gruesome puzzle, and he's off again, walking through deductions with practiced ease.

All of his deductions- including one involving a certain thief, though that one is a much quieter, subdued deduction.

He opens the door, anxious and adrenaline hyped, finding only a smug smirk and a suave quip, and then he's gone.


	3. Storm

Moonlight filters in through thin white curtains, tracing patterns across the cold wood flooring as the wind blows them astray.

Shinichi stands, pushing the fabric aside to look out at the night, pretending, if only for a moment, that everything was the way it had been not a few weeks ago, pretending he was _himself_.

Behind him, Kogorou makes a displeased noise as the light hits his face. Shinichi lowers his hand just as the wind dies down, and the curtains fall back into place, basking the world into darkness once again.

Shinichi removes his glasses and settles back down in yet another fruitless attempt at sleep.

* * *

"KID!"

Kaito laughs, feeling the wind in his hair as he stands over his adoring crowd, arms spread in open invitation- _Come and get me! Catch me if you can!_ -and he grins down at the Task Force beneath him. Moonlight bounces off the white of his suit, catching on the glass of his monocle and the edge of his smile.

A door slams open behind him, and he turns, grinning. "Nakamori- _keibu_ ," he greets, giving a short bow. "What a pleasure!"

"Damn you, Kaitou KID!" Nakamori-keibu snarls, lips curled back. "Return the jewel, now!"

"Now now, don't be hasty now," Kaito croons, cape billowing in the wind as he holds his prize in the air. "I'm afraid I cannot do that at the moment. Another time, perhaps?" With that, he leans back, throwing his balance off so he's falling, falling-

He snaps his glider into place and grins.

"Goodnight!"

The crowd's excited screams follow him into the night.

* * *

Shinichi dreams of bloodstained floors and desperate cries for help, a crystal pulsing like a heart in the middle of a room, moonlight filtering in onto the jewel and dying the room red. The screaming only gets louder.

He wakes up with a start and can't bring himself to go back to sleep for the rest of the week.

He can't look himself in the mirror, either.

* * *

Aoko confesses to him in the morning.

He considers it, knowing it's what he _wants_ , but he's hurt her too much already.

In the end, he has no choice but to reject her. He turns, dropping his poker face to look at her regretfully, but before he can say a word-

The glass in her hands falls to the floor with a loud _crash_.

Kaito takes a step forward, eyebrows drawn. "Aoko-"

But she turns away, hands pressed against her face. "No, no it's fine," She says, voice wavering. She scrubs at her cheeks, trying to stop her tears. "Aoko understands."

"Aoko, please, I-" Katio starts again, trying (and failing, _terribly_ ) to force himself to feel anything, because the moment he tried to speak, his mask slammed down without his consent and suddenly he felt empty. "Aoko…"

"You don't have to push yourself for Aoko, Kaito," she says, and he knows she can see the emptiness in his eyes-she's always been good at reading past his poker face, after all. "Aoko knows you didn't want to hurt her."

Kaito knows, distantly, that he shouldn't be feeling _relieved_ at her shouldn't be glad to know she's _giving up_ on him, but somehow, inexplicably, he is. And that, that sends him through a whole new roller coaster of emotions that he still can't quite reach. "...I'm sorry, Aoko."

She smiles weakly at him, eyes watery and heartbroken and sad. "It's okay, Kaito. It's okay."

He wishes he could believe her.

* * *

Shinichi blinks up blearily at the ceiling, cursing his childish appearance for depriving him of his much valued sources of caffeine. In all honesty, he doesn't understand why Ran is so insistent on him not having the stuff- the thing about "stunting growth" or whatever is 100% false, and coffee itself isn't actually all that bad for kids. _Whatever_ , he thinks with a groan, sitting up and rubbing at his eyes.

"Conan- _kun_ , hurry up! We don't want you to be late for school!" Ran calls, and with another low groan, he tugs on his clothes and attaches his bowtie.

"Coming, Ran- _neechan_!" He replies with that too-sweet child voice he's been using. (Has he mentioned how much he hates being a kid again? Because he _hates_ it.) He bounds down the stairs, backpack slung over one shoulder and glasses pressed firmly against the bridge of his nose.

Ran smiles at him, bright and cheery, eyes slightly hollow from a night of tears he knows is his fault. (He could hear it through the walls, faint, shuddering sobs of his name in the dead of night,) It _hurts_ , more than anything he's ever felt before, but he shoves it aside and skips down the rest of the steps and grins up at her, landing on the final step with a particularly large jump. She gives a soft giggle, raising a hand to her mouth, shoulders relaxing minutely.

"Ready, Conan- _kun_?"

"Yup!" He blinks up at her with wide eyes, pretending that he can't see the stress lines in the corners of her eyes or the way she looks at him like she's trying to remember something important. "Let's go, Ran- _neechan_!"

* * *

Sirens follow him into the night, tire screeches and shouting audible even from his vantage point in the sky. He comes to a stop on a high-up balcony, standing on the railing so that only the moonlight can reach him. The window behind him opens,curtain shoved aside to reveal a small girl looking up at him with wide eyes.

"Who are you?" she asks, all childish curiosity- real childish curiosity."Dracula- _san_?"

"No," He huffs a short laugh, hopping down from the railing to kneel before her. "I've simply come to rest my wings. I'm just your average magician," He pauses, kissing the back of her hand. "Ojou- _san_."

Suddenly, bright lights shine upon them, and Kaito blinks in mild surprise.A helicopter sounds loudly from above, and he stands, turning to face the lights.

With a fond roll of his eyes, Kaito hops back onto the railing, tipping his hat a little at the girl. "Farewell, Ojou- _san_."

There's a gasp from behind him, and with a smirk, he jumps.

* * *

Shinichi hears about Ayumi's...encounter with Kaitou KID the next day. The other kids are chattering excitedly, saying this and that about the thief, calling him the Heisei Lupin.

Haibara turns to him with a smug smirk. "And? What does the Heisei Holmes intend to do?"

Shinichi rolls his eyes. "Don't be stupid. I'll catch him sooner or later."

She simply raises a brow and turns away.


	4. Dream

The floor beneath his feet is gravely and uneven, crunching and shifting audibly with every hesitant step he takes.

"Hello?" He calls out into the night. No one responds.

The woods around him (How long has he been in the woods? Since when were there trees?) open to a wide clearing, revealing a glittering expanse of sky. He pauses at the edge of the trees, staring up at the stars in surprise.

"What are you doing here?" Someone says, voice low and smooth and eerily familiar. He looks up, confused, and sees-

A face, almost identical to his own, if not for the slight differences in the curve of his nose and the dip of his lip and the height of his cheekbones. Eyes, dark blue and stormy, glare at him from the other side of the clearing, still bathed in shadow.

"What do you mean?" Kaito asks, taking a few more steps forward. "What is this place?"

The man at the other edge shakes his head, hesitating at the line of trees before closing his eyes and taking a few cautious steps forward. "How did you even get here?" He asks, tucking a hand into his pocket. "I don't know you enough for you to be here. And you seem to be perfectly fine..."

His eyes open. Blue quickly turns red under the moonlight, and the ground is basked in red.

"You're-" Kaito's eyes widen, and he takes a step forward.

The man flinches, raising a hand to shade his eyes from the light. "I-"

There's a spray of bullets from _somewhere_ within the darkness of the forest, and pain sears up his side, sending Kaito stumbling forward with a gasp. The man rushes forward, arms outstretched and eyes wide with panic. "KID!"

A silent voice whispering in the wind. _Quickly, quickly! Before it's too late, before not even you can help, not without-_

Kaito feels arms wrap around him just as his knees give out, warm and gentle around his shoulders. His vision blurs, and he reaches down to pat at the source of pain. His hand comes back up, silk gloves stained red with blood. (Since when was he wearing his KID suit? He could have sworn he was wearing black earlier.) The man swats his hand away and cradles him carefully in his arms, leading him forward to a stone table in the center of the clearing.

"What," Kaito breathes, a low hiss of pain, "Are you doing?"

The man shushes him, crawling best he can onto stone benches and laying him across the flat surface. He blinks rapidly, nose scrunching up adorably as he tries to- actually, what is he doing? What?

"This isn't working," The man breathes, half-panicked and fearful, grasping desperately at Kaito's hands. He chokes on a cry of frustration that wells tears in the corner of his eyes. They glow a faint blue-green under the moonlight, streaking down his cheeks and falling in a graceful shimmer onto Kaito's knuckles. The man pauses, watching the bead of water roll down his arm, and then he gasps, catching the droplets with a hands and moving to stand over his torso, tilting his hand just-so so that they fall into the bloodied fabric of his suit and into gaping wounds. "There we go…"

Someone screams, voice ragged and high with agony, desperate and pained. "Shinichi!" A wet cough, a low groan. "Kudou.. _kun_..." More gunshots. The man flinches but does not turn away from Kaito.

"...Shinichi? Is that your name?" Kaito breathes, reaching up to cup his cheek. His thumb brushes away the glowing tears. Shinichi takes a breath, eyes wide, hair hiding the blue from the moonlight and brightening them to oceans.

Everything comes to an abrupt stop, basking them in silence.

And then the world explodes.

* * *

Shinichi wakes up with a start, blinking himself back into reality. He looks down at his watch, pointedly ignoring his hands _(too small_ ), and blinks at the time. It's 3 o'clock in the morning.

The window rattles- it's shut, tonight, and the heavier curtains are drawn to block out the light. Everything seems eerily still, the shadows looming overhead and around the room.

Shinichi lays back down with a heavy sigh. He won't get anymore sleep, not tonight.

* * *

Kaito wakes up drenched in sweat. His side aches mildly, and he swings his legs over the edge of the bad to clamber over to the bathroom. His tank red with blood that's already dried, and in a panic, he peels it off to see-

A faint bruise where he remembers being shot in his dream, the rest of the skin on his stomach completely blemish-free, scars from past encounters with guns and the like having seemingly disappeared from where they had been not hours ago.

He blinks, rubbing at his eyes in confusion. Thinking it no more than a nightmare(?)-induced hallucination, he shrugs and heads back to bed.

"Kudou Shinichi, huh? How interesting." He whispers into the night, pulling up his sheets.

Sleep pulls him back with ease.

* * *

 _Hey so i probably should have introduced myself in ch.1 but im using one big 'ol document for this fic bc inspiration never comes with continuity (continuity? never met her) so adding end notes is kinda weird but idk._

 _Anyway i'm Swan it's nice to meet y'all, hope you like my fic i guess? Shrugs. There's no real reasoning behind this chapter other than i wanted them to share dreams. (comprehensible plot? Who's she?) kinda short chapter too but like,, i gotta work on some actual plot in the next chapter so...yeah._

 _Okay anyway i think i'm done rambling. a big thank you to those of you that have left a review (I'm lookin' at you YourLocalAlchemist), that always makes my day and brings chapters faster so... yeah anyway love y'all bye._


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